Lessons from a Mustard Seed

It was just a normal Sunday. One where I would be convicted, promise God I’d change and then go home and forget about my promise. Then it happened, Pastor Bob handed out the tiniest seed I’ve ever seen. This mustard seed was symbolic of the amount of faith we need to have to move mountains. Well, I felt pretty confident that I had a large amount of faith (at least more than this tiny seed) and I would have patted myself on the back, but I’m Baptist and we aren’t the prideful type! (haha!!) I cradled the mustard seed in my left hand and agreed to the challenge of not losing it during the service. I tightened my grip on it and this little symbol of faith became my focus. It didn’t take long for my hand to start cramping up while I protected my “seed of faith.” Well, I was holding my seed and trying to flip through the Bible while filling out my notes (that’s a lot of multi-tasking even for a mom). I instantly thought; I’ll have Eric hold my seed so I can freely do what I need to. Well, he was already holding his own seed and our youngest daughter. He wasn’t going be able to hold my seed for me. When our daughter started fussing, I realized that it would be easier to take care of her if I set my seed down. But before I did I remember my promise to hold onto it. Then I wished my seed was bigger, so I could just put it in my pocket. Well, she, I and the seed left to fill her belly and as I was sitting I opened my hand to look at my tiny mustard seed. I noticed that by holding my seed so tightly it has left its imprint in the middle of my hand. I laughed, and then a realization hit me like a pie in the face. When was the last time I let my faith leave its imprint on me and others? When was the last time I held onto it, focused on it and protected it even though it was uncomfortable? Why did I expect my husband to carry my faith for me when I felt overwhelmed? How could I set my faith to the side in the name of motherhood? Or wish I could pocket it when it was inconvenient for me to carry. I am supposed to have enough faith to move a mountain, but right now I couldn’t topple an anthill. The mustard seed is just a seed. It possesses no special power, yet God used it to show me how quickly I shelve Him and then wonder why my mountain didn’t move. So this “typical” Sunday became one of my most profound. I want to have faith the size of a mustard seed, so I have to stop trying to pass my faith off for someone else to protect and strengthen. I have to stop using my children as an excuse to put God on my “to do” list. And even when it hurts, I have to pull my faith out of my pocket of convenience and hold onto it so tight that it leaves its imprint on my life and others. The mountains in my life may continue to mock me saying, “It’s never going to get better.” But instead of being defeated by the lie now I pray, “Lord, increase my faith.”

written by: Dianna